Let me ask you a serious question: When’s the last time that everything in your life went 100% as planned? If I had to take a wild guess, you probably thought of more instances where things didn’t go your way than vice-versa.
The truth is, sometimes no matter how hard we try and how much planning and list-making we do, there are things that are always going to be simply beyond our control. Things that despite our best efforts just don’t pan out the way we want them to and we’re left with two choices: let it consume you or let it motivate you.
When Life Throws You a Curveball
As I recently shared with you in this post over here, our family is currently in the process of moving to Georgia. Just one week ago, we were within 15 days of closing on a home, were getting ready to post our house in VA for sale, had everything planned out exactly for when our kids would start school in GA, and then…life threw us a curveball.
The house that we had our hearts set on ended up having major roof issues and despite our best negotiation efforts, the sellers weren’t willing to cover the cost of replacing it. So we had to walk away.
In the end that meant my husband had to leave to start his job in Georgia all by himself, and for now it’s just me and the kids here in Virginia until we can find a new place to live and sell our home here. It definitely was not what we wanted or had planned for.
And to be honest, at first I wanted to do nothing more than sit around and wallow in it. It was super disappointing that things didn’t work out the way we wanted to, even though we tried our hardest to ensure everything would.
But what good would that really do? Like it or not, things don’t go our way on almost a daily basis and as easy as it would be to sit around complaining about this and that, it’s completely counterproductive.
While watching my new favorite series Parenthood the other day, I was so inspired by a quote in one of the episodes. “Life will knock you down more times than you can imagine. Don’t knock yourself down.”
Sometimes, we can try with all of our might to stay grounded and never falter or fail, but it’s inevitable. Life is going to knock you down and you’ll face challenges at every turn. But don’t knock yourself down. Just because things don’t always work out the way we want them to, doesn’t mean we should stop trying or give up on ourselves. Because for everything that goes wrong in our lives there’s another great thing out there just waiting to be discovered. And who knows? It just might be a million times better than that thing you had “planned” for.
Instead of letting this small curve ball get me down, I’m reminding myself that perspective is everything and I’m choosing to focus on all the good things in our lives. Despite the fact that our family is apart right now, I couldn’t be more proud of my husband in starting his new job and I’m so excited to be getting started with being a full-time blogger.
It’ll be hard being away from each other for a little while, but we’ve did the long-distance thing before and it will make it all the more worthwhile once we get to be together again. I’m also beyond thrilled that our boys just started kindergarten and second grade, and to see their sweet faces every afternoon when I pick them up from school absolutely melts my heart.
Although the house we had our hearts set on purchasing didn’t end up panning out, I’m a firm believer that things happen for a reason and I know we’re going to end up finding something even better out there.For now, I’m just so thankful for all of our blessings and I’m choosing to not let life’s little lemons and curveballs get to me.
For those of you who have been thrown a curveball of your own lately, how have you handled it? Did you choose to let it motivate you? Let me know in the comments!
Cheers to a wonderful week ahead, friends. Thanks for stopping by!- Cara
Erica @ Coming up Roses says
So sorry you have to deal with that curveball! Love your attitude, though. Even when all we want to do is wallow in the circumstances, we need to pick ourselves up and see it as a blessing in disguise. It would have been awful to get into that house and have major issues later.
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks girl, I appreciate it! And you’re so right! It would have been worse to have found out the news AFTER. Fingers crossed, we’re hoping for some positive news today or tomorrow! 🙂
erin says
Sorry to hear about the frustrating news. On a positive note, at least you’ll be moving in the fall when it’s pleasant in Georgia. (Unless you’re headed to N. Georgia…it’s beautiful there even during the summer months! I live in Savannah and it’s so dang HOT rn!!) Sending prayers that you’ll find the perfect house soon so you can all be together. Oh, and super exciting that you’ll be a full time blogger! hugs, erin
PS: I’ll make a decent-sized purchase through your Amazon links in just a few minutes to help perk up your day. (Hopefully, at least! It always makes me happy when people buy through our links. lol)
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks Erin! We’ll be in South Georgia, so that’s good to know! And thanks so much, I definitely appreciate it! 🙂
Taylor Mobley says
Ugh. What a mess!! It’s crazy how life does this sometimes. You can do it girlfriend!!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thank-you! Staying positive! 🙂
Kendel says
My curveball wasn’t recent, per se, but it was when I found out that I was pregnant. I never, ever planned on having children, but I couldn’t NOT have this baby. He motivated me to do everything and I haven’t looked back. In fact, I’m already planning when I would like to have another one 😉 A door will close, but a window will open! I’m sure you and your family will find a house that is 100000% better than the first! …And it’ll happen sooner than you think.
Kindly Unspoken says
Aw that’s amazing, Kendel! Being a mother is such a wonderful blessing, even though it can totally be scary/life-changing in the beginning. Congrats to you and thanks for the words of encouragement! 🙂
Marette Flora says
So sorry this happened, but I hope you find an even better home and can join your husband soon!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks so much! I truly believe it will work out very soon!
Sierra says
Life definitely doesn’t always go as planned and more times than not we always find ourselves in some sort of situation. I have come to stay firm in knowing that everything happens for a reason and when we try to do things on our time, God’s timing is always best. We’ve been upset about houses we’ve lost before but in the end when we do find the right one, we are always so thankful the other ones fell through. Everything will work out but I can imagine how hard it must be to all be away from each other. Hoping things come together fast for you <3 Beautifully Candid
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks so much! And what you said is so true. A lot of times we get discouraged because things don’t happen according to our calendar/timing, but God always knows what’s best! I know it will all work out very soon! 🙂
Erica @ Coming Up Roses says
UGH – that’s the WORST feeling, Cara. But really, it just means God is setting y’all up with something even BETTER!
Coming Up Roses
Kindly Unspoken says
Absolutely! He always has a better plan for us anyways! 🙂
Indya | TheSmallAdventurer says
That really sucks that the house felt through, I bet you would have been really looking forward to it. It’s so easy to wallow – believe me when I say I’m the queen of wallowing – and I really admire your decision to change perspectives. Distance is awful but it will make your relationship even stronger. Hope you find a new house soon!
Indya || http://www.thesmalladventurer.blogspot.com.au/
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks so much! We were apart for the first 8 months of our marriage(military life), so this will be nothing compared to that haha.
jill conyers says
It’s a challenge for sure, but if keeping your perspective positive or maybe in a what can I learn from this mode will make all the difference in how well you handle the curve balls.
Kindly Unspoken says
Absolutely! Staying positive is key!
Diane @ ThisScatteredLife says
How disappointing on the house. Most times I’ve found that in hindsight the things that don’t work out the way we wish are really blessings that we realize much later. Best wishes on the house hunting! 😀
Kindly Unspoken says
Yes! Little blessings in disguise happen more than we like to admit! And thank-you!
Sara says
Glad you found the roof issue before buying the house!! It does suck to have to be apart and wait for awhile, that’s for sure. Love that quote from Parenthood though.
Kindly Unspoken says
Me and you both! How awful would it have been to have gained that lovely expense immediately after buying the home. Definitely worked out for the best in the end I think!
Helen says
I love that quote, but I hate that you didn’t get the house you wanted. You have such a good attitude about the whole thing. I’m sure you will find an even better house!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thank-you! That quote is so true in regards to all areas of life! 🙂
Kristin Cook says
I love that quote!
Life really does hit us hard sometimes. When the curve-balls come, we have a choice in how we handle them. We may have to fight against the criticism of others, but we don’t need to make it so that we also have to fight ourselves.
Kindly Unspoken says
That’s so true Kristin! It’s all in the way we choose to respond!
SMD says
Very disappointing but you’ve got this. Everything is temporary even though it doesn’t feel like it when we’re in it.
My past experience in losing out on houses leads me to believe that we end up where we are supposed to be even when where we thought we’d be seemed perfect at the time.
Hang in there!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thank-you! That definitely makes me feel better about it, and I think you’re so right!
Pamela Sequins & Sea Breezes says
That same thing happened to one of my co-workers back in June! A roof is a major thing that you don’t want to mess with so even though it’s a sucky situation, it’s definitely for the best and you’ll find your perfect dream home soon!
Kindly Unspoken says
Exactly! They kept downplaying it like it wasn’t a big issue, but we weren’t willing to just shuffle it under the rug lol. I know it worked out for the best in the end!
Kim says
I just bet you’ll find an even better house!!! Maybe that door closed because a bigger, better door will open. Good luck
Kindly Unspoken says
Absolutely! I’m holding onto that right now! Thank-you 🙂
Eki Ayemenre says
Great post Cara! Life is hard enough without being so hard on ourselves. Sometimes life doesn’t go the way we plan it… but these challenges make us tougher people.
Kindly Unspoken says
Thank-you! The lessons we learn make us smarter and stronger in the end! 🙂
Michael @ Super Millennial says
Life definitely does this from time to time…great job focusing on the good things. As Tony Robbins says — it’s impossible to be frustrated, angry or pissed off when you are appreciating!
Kindly Unspoken says
That’s a great quote! And so true! Thank-you 🙂
Sarah @ Foxy's Domestic Side says
Boo to not getting your house! But that just means that something better is going to come along and you’ll be thankful for this house falling through so another house/ your house you’ll be able to find! Good luck and I hope that the time apart from your hubby is small.
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks Sarah! That’s what I’m holding onto right now! Here’s to finding something even better! 🙂
Tanya Dufour says
Life throws me curve balls all the time. Seems like on a weekly basis lately lol So when I was first looking at condos yearsss ago I found one I loved but it was under agreement. So I looked and looked at others and I didn’t really fall in love with anything but settled on two that would “work” for a first home. When we were debating on which one to make an offer on I started thinking about that first townhouse I saw and my ex father in law reached out the realtor. In the end, the offer with the other party fell through and we were able to make an offer! Anyways, this was in Sept/October and we were supposed to close in December. Something got held up with the paperwork and our closing had to be cancelled. We didn’t end up getting to close till Feb/March and moved in in April. So in all, things didn’t work out how I wanted but it was worth the wait because I got the townhouse I really wanted. It just took alot longer than I hoped. I bet you you will find an even more perfect house for your family! It sucks that your husband is apart from you guys but it will all be worth it in the end and absence makes the heart grow fonder!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks for sharing that story, that definitely makes me feel better about the process. Home buying can be such a tiring thing at times, but like you said it’ll all work out for the best in the end. Have a great weekend, girl!
Timothy Ferguson says
Sorry about the whole thing but believe me the Lord is in charge of everything and it will all work out. You know you can count on old Dad here and your Mommy any time. We love you and I love your blog. Keep reaching for the stars as Kasey Kasem used to say.
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks Dad. We love you!
stephanie says
that is so horrible. I am sorry that happened to you!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks Steph!
Jennifer says
First off, I’m so sorry to hear about the house. That is a rough blow, and anything that separates the family is always hard. I’m so sorry. But, I’m so impressed by your outlook and I will be sending positive vibes and prayers that everything comes together for you guys soon. I know this is a big move for you, and I just know it will all work out for the very best!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thank-you Jennifer! Fingers crossed that we find a home very soon! 🙂
Belle says
First, I didn’t know that you live in VA; I am in VA as well! 🙂 Second, I am so sorry that things didn’t work out for the house in GA! I agree with you, I’m a firm believer that things happen for a reason. We may not understand it now, but soon we will and we’ll just realize why it had to happen that way! My life is far from perfect; challenges come and go; and I recently just realized that I won’t ever get the peaceful life I’ve been dreaming of because of things I cannot control. But what I’m holding on to now, is the fact that I have 2 beautiful kids – thank God I still have 2, and a very supportive husband. As long as I have them, no matter how hard things can sometimes get, I know everything will be alright! Good luck in finding a buyer in your house in VA and I do hope you get to be with your husband in GA soon! You have such a great perspective, Cara!
Belle | One Awesome Momma
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks so much Belle! And yep I live on the far southwest end. You’re in Richmond, right? And I’m sorry to hear things are challenging for your right now. If you ever need to talk or anything , just let me know! I’m a great listener! 😉 Have a great weekend girl!
Denay DeGuzman says
Oh Cara, this situation is so heartbreaking, especially since your husband is far away and now your kiddos need to start school in one city and later transfer to another one mid-year. I am sending good energy your way that a beautiful new home, even better than the one with the roofing issue, will enter your lives – it’s just been waiting for you to come along and discover it. Keep your spirits high and know things will turn out even better than you ever expected!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thank-you SO much! I really appreciate your sweet comment! 🙂
Meg Taylor says
Good luck with your move! My brother and sister-in-law have been on the home search for many months and experienced roof problems just like you. They just found the perfect location for them, and just know everything happens for a reason!
Meg, Borrowed Heaven
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks Meg! It will all work out in the end, I’m sure of it! 🙂
steph says
Perspective really is everything. A simple change of perspective can change the most difficult situation into a learning experience. I try to surround myself with what motivates me, positivity and light when curveballs come my way. Good luck!
Kindly Unspoken says
Absolutely! It’s good to stay positive when you can, as it makes you be so much more understanding. Thank-you!
Leslie Soto says
I am so sorry that things fell through with the house you wanted. I know it’s so annoying when your heart is set on something and it falls through. I’m glad you didn’t buy the house and then discover the roof after though. This season of life is tough but you have the right mindset, it will be worth it when you are all together again, living in some home you never even knew you dreamed of (that happened to my hubby & I when we were going through the building/buying process). Hang in there sweet girl!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks so much Leslie! And absolutely, I’m so glad we found out before we bought the home and then would have had that huge expense!
Rebecca J Vincent says
What a perfect quote. Dont you love when TV shows come up with the best inspiration.
Yep – you are going to be in the home you are meant to be… so dont sweat what YOU think you need. God has bigger plans 😉
Kindly Unspoken says
Well said! We don’t even really know what we need sometimes…haha 😉
Rachel Ritlop says
OMG, I love that quote from Parenthood! And it’s so applicable to working towards any sort of goal!
Kindly Unspoken says
Definitely! I love all the important lessons on Parenthood. It’s such a good show!
Kate says
I’m so sorry girlie! Sending all the hugs and prayers that the right house will come along, and you can all be together again asap. Your attitude is amazing, and I believe the next house will be the right one for your family <3
Green Fashionista
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks Kate! I really appreciate your sweet comment! 🙂
Whitney says
Sorry that house fell through! I hate when things don’t go as planned, but in the long run it seems like sometimes something even better comes along. Love your attitude and your positive outlook. Hope this time is sweet with your boys and that you can get moved soon.
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks so much! Fingers crossed, things are hopefully looking up and we may have found another home! 🙂
Kiara says
Thank you for sharing the latest in your personal life because I’m sure there are many other people who can benefit from hearing your story! Although things may be difficult now, everything will always work out the way it’s meant to!
Kindly Unspoken says
That’s so true! And that’s exactly why I share these types of posts. It’s always in the hope that it will help someone else out there who is in a similar situation. Have a great weekend! 🙂
Adriana Renee says
Oh man, sending you some positive vibes! I’m not good with curveballs because I’m a planner so it’s not fun!
Kindly Unspoken says
I struggle with them as well, because I’m a Type A planner, but sometimes you just gotta take the high road and stay positive. Happy Friday!
Andrea Nine says
I am so very sorry about the house! Life seems so unfair at times but God remains with us and I believe that things will work out even better for you. Lots of love and hugs your way beautiful mama!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thank-you Andrea! That’s so true. No matter what, God is always on our side even when it feels hopeless. Hope you have a great weekend, friend!
Lily says
I’m so sorry things didn’t work out, but like you, I’m a firm believer in things happening for a reason as well.
I pray that things work out for y’all.
xo, Lily
Beauty With Lily
Kindly Unspoken says
Thank-you Lily! It’s sometimes hard to understand why something happens, but I truly believe it just means something better is waiting around the corner! 🙂
Emelia says
I’m so sorry that house didn’t work out but you definitely have the right attitude. I feel like the past 2 years we have been given way too much, but somehow we always make it through. Sending you positive vibes. Xo!
Kindly Unspoken says
Thank-you! It’s unfortunate sometimes the things we’re thrown, but it’s how we handle and respond to them that’s truly important. Sending positive vibes right back at ya, girl! 🙂
Amanda at The Light Owl says
Oh my goodness your housing experience sounds terrible! We had a major curveball thrown at us the day before we were supposed to close on our house (the bank wasn’t being up front with us and we found out the DAY BEFORE closing that they hadn’t even started processing our mortgage application.) We were fortunate that the homeowners didn’t bail on us. We still got the house, but it took twice as long and it was just awful. Good for you for being able to have a positive mindset in the midst of the struggle.
Kindly Unspoken says
Oh no, that is a curveball too! Glad everything worked out for you all! I’m hopeful that we’ll find another house soon enough, so we can get back to normal! 🙂
Lindsay says
I hate that this happened to you guys. I can’t imagine how frustrating it is for you family. And somehow I missed your news – I’m missing so many posts in Bloglovin right now! This post is spot-on. I certainly have been thrown a lot of curveballs the past few years. What can you do but keep going? Keep your head up, friend! PS: isn’t Parenthood the best?
Kindly Unspoken says
Thank-you! And I know bloglovin is so weird sometimes, I don’t see posts until like days later, so really no worries girl! I honestly think Parenthood is one of the best shows out there. I’m always so inspired by all the lessons in each of the episodes. Happy Friday!
Erin | A Welder's Wife says
I hate that you did not get the house you wanted, but I bet there is an even better one out there waiting for you. It can definitely be difficult being separated from your husband. My husband used to work off, and I would get to see him once every two weeks or so. While it was one of the most exciting times in our marriage [we got to travel and explore when we were together], it was not easy by any means. I hope this will pass quickly, and that you can be with him very soon! Until then, definitely savor the small moments, as you mentioned with your adorable guys.
Kindly Unspoken says
Thanks I really appreciate it, Erin! 🙂